Dear NASA and President Obama:
I am excited to hear of today's highly successful launch of the new Ares1-X rocket. Onward to the moon. So what if it's boldly going to where we already have been. I think it's cool.
When you do gear up for what is truly the next great challenge - going to Mars - I want to volunteer for the first mission. The good news is that with my trusty ventriloquist characters along, I will always have company on the long journey. If there needs to be more people on the crew, I'm sure they will learn to enjoy either my dummy or my monkey puppet. Both can be quite charming.
I realize this adventure is many years away. I will drop you a line every so often as I hone my craft and work towards being the first ventiloquist in space. As my very regular (and hey, I was just being friendly) notes to Paula Abdul resulted in an utterly ridiculous restraining order, please let me know how often is permissible.
My email is email@example.com. I look forward to hearing from you.