It takes a schticker, too

As if I actually know anything, sometimes it's best to forget hunting for a joke that's not there.

I kept writing and rewriting about the notion that the Native Americans have no flag of their own to march behind at the Winter Olympics, their "nations" span the Americas, and that kind of coverage you can only find with Budding Ventriloquist Winter Olympic Coverage (TM) .

Believe me, the snippets above were the best of the search for the joke that wasn't there. And, I was only going there to throw a call-out to Rey Ortega, my new friend in the ventriloquist world.

Long story about how Rey stumbled across this online gig I have, and where the conversation started. But after I referred to myself as a "Schticker without a Cause", I asked Rey, "Is there a Native American term for 'schtick'?"

Those of you under about 35 and have no idea what "Borscht Belt" entertainment was need some background. The official Merriam-Webster definition for Schtick is:

Etymology: Yiddish shtik pranks, literally, piece, from Middle High German stücke, from Old High German stucki; akin to Old English stycce piece, Old High German stoc stick — more at stock

1 : a usually comic or repetitious performance or routine : bit
2 : one's special trait, interest, or activity : bag <he's alive and well and now doing his shtick out in Hollywood — Robert Daley>

Rey's response was:

"There is a word for schtick.

"It's Heyoka, a trickster, someone teaches people to do the right thing by doing the opposite. These people look for the deeper meanings in life and try to find ways to communicate them to the world. 

"You're a teacher disguised as a comic."

You too, my friend. Or back at ya. Or whatever the kids say these days.

Here's Rey and his buddy JC.  Rey's body "English" (funny choice of words?) is exceptional. It takes the illusion to that blurry level of  being embraced by it and forgetting that it's an illusion. His humor is infectious, too.

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Rey's online center is The Wisdom Tree. Remember, Rey, with my BVWOC(TM)'s international appeal growing by leaps and bounds, you can't get better free advertising than this!

Well, maybe you can...

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One of the best aspects of my ventriloquest (I love that word, and believe I made it up all by myself) is making contacts in the ventriloquist network. Now that I've mastered embedding videos, I owe Dave Markham and Steve Hurst some of this "high tech" callout, too.

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Thanks Merriam. Thanks Webster. You two are the best. Anyone that doesn't have you two bookmarked in their browser and buy a hard copy for your latest book besides is not using the best resource around.

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Now, the Czech Republic?  Eight from India? Jumpin' Jiminy. It's like the world has been waiting for BVWOC(TM).

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Does the acronym work for you?  Hope so.

Flying Monkeys?

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me,

Seven Monkey Puppets

Six Hours Practice

Five Funny Jokes

(Ja)eff Dunham Tickets,

Three Good Springs,

Two Moving Eyebrows,

And a full-sized ventriloquist dummy.
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In the pedestrian version of the Twelve Days of Christmas, the lines are "seven swans a-swimming" and "six geese a-laying". If you've ever encountered a swan or a goose in real life, trust me - they are mean, nasty creatures that bite very hard. 

Giving your beloved ventriloquist a bunch of monkey puppets and a few hours to work on some schtick is much kinder gifting, to be sure.

Hep Cats

As I work on different voices for characters, I get flashes of inspiration in the flavors of "a whole act."

For instance, singing along with Frank Sinatra's incredible The Lady is a Tramp,  I hear him us the term "broad" referring to the title female, And FLASH - why not create a cool Las Vegas night club singer-type who calls women "broads" and says "hey baby" a lot.

Then FLASH - a ventriloquist homage to the Rat Pack. (I'm flying now - weee!) A quick reality check (in terms of the voices):

• Frank Sinatra - Challenging; not actually that distinct. It's all about phrasing.
• Dean Martin - would actually play better in a Dean Martin/ Jerry Lewis schtick.
• Sammy Davis - I can just say "groovy" a lot; but that doesn't make my imitation that good.
• Peter Lawford - um.... who was he again?
• Joey Bishop - I perfected many years ago. The best of the bunch.

Then, my enthusiasm wanes. A spot-on Joey Bishop imitation just doesn't get a guy very far these days. And having seen videos of the "Summit at the Sands," the other reality is they weren't that funny. Their "cool" was way whack, but on the humorgrammeter? Not really.

Rats. Got to move on.

Maybe my old Perry Como albums will inspire something.

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It's true. The Rat Pack wasn't actually very funny. However, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis were actually very funny.

My "Jerry Lewis as a human ventriloquist dummy" fixation has still strong. And before you ask (because I know you are checking the sidebar list), he's not on the "faces" list because it's not just about his face. Kapeesh? (For all you spellers out there - Capisci?)

Monkey-monkey time

I am finding it difficult to get any quality time with my monkey. But I'm not too forlorn. It's not every guy who can say that to begin with.

A surprising realization is that the coordination it takes to move his mouth and "vent" a voice isn't actually that easy.  I keep moving his mouth when I'm talking, too.

But, as I piece together an actual schtick with my furry buddy (still nameless), I figure it will start off with him in childlike voice, doing babyish exploring behavior.  Then he'll surprise me with his actual voice, which might sound like a truck driver.

Or maybe Marlon Brando, who barely moved his lips when he talked, either.

It's all baby steps, to be sure. All progress is progress.