Thursday, January 19, 2012

Mr. Speaker!

I have been chasing the ventriloquist dream for over two years now.


Because all the puppets I have were gifts from kind friends, all I have actually have invested in cold, hard cash is:
  • $10 in business cards
  • $5 in clothes at a thrift store for George.
My family bought George some clothes for Christmas last year, too.  This year he was stiffed. (Surprisingly, he’s said nothing about it.) 


In return, I have earned:
  • $0 for performing, but I haven’t really tried.
  • $8.19 on account for allowing Google to put ads on this blog. When it hits $10.00, I actually get a check. I can taste the lattes aleady. Both of them.
To be fair, I’m still practicing and learning how to do ventriloquism. Obviously, slow and steady does win a race every so often.  It's the time investment that really counts.


But I just heard there’s another job where the pay was described by Republican Presidential Candidate Mitt Romney as “not much.” Still, it was over $374,000. That's a lot more than $8.19 on account. The job even sounds just as part time as the ventriloquism gig. In fact, the way he made it sound, it wasn’t much of a job at all.


It's being a speaker and earning speaker fees.


And unlike ventriloquism, I already know how to speak. I do. Really. 


So, earning speaker’s fees would be a cinch - or as the Brits say, a piece of piss. (Can you tell I’ve been doing too much BBC’ing lately?) 


But the real question is this: Should I change this blog’s name to Budding Speaker or start a new one?


I realize the answer would seem obvious that I should just start a new one. But when you keep in mind that the URL for this blog contains the words “dailydummy," which is so applicable to… 


Hey, forget account the speaker fee thing. Maybe I could just sell the "dailydummy" blog address to a pro-Romney SuperPAC so they can dis Gingrich. Or sell it to a pro-Gingrich SuperPAC so they can dis Romney. Or they can go halfsies to dis Ron Paul or Rick Santorum right out of the race. But no matter what, "dailydummy" + Republican politics sure looks and smells to me like...


Ka-CHING!

I knew there was a ka-CHING for me in this game somewhere. Thank heavens I've found it!

I can't wait to tell George.


###
Ah, the power of babble.

###

Politics, at least in its current manifestation, is either going to make a lot of comedians (and Budding Comedians) very rich or put them all out of business. They might turn comedians into a useless lot because, hey, who can't make fun of these people these days?


This Message was paid for by the Budding Ventriloquist SuperPAC (BVSPAC) who is solely responsible for its content.  See above for full disclosure on its funding - and what SuperPAC other that BVSPAC has full disclosure, huh?
BVSPAC has not officially filed any papers with the Federal Election Commission, nor do I believe it is necessary until Google ponies up the ten spot.

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