Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Like a stadium roof...

Life a stadium roof, the number of correct picks by the fearless prognosticators at Budding Ventriloquist Presents Gridiron Gurus fell.

Six right out of 16 is pretty embarrassing.  

Then again, Nostradamus hasn't been even close to 37.5 percent correct, even with the most broad interpretations of his forecasts.  Weather forecasters are totally wrong half the time, and at least somewhat wrong 90 percent of the time.

Suppose I told you that Nostradamus forecasted that:
 "A great 'Giant' will smite and flummox the screeching 'Eagle', but whence he becomes distracted the eagle shall soar."
You'd figure that he was talking about the New York Giants doing an el foldo, right?

Or suppose I said a weather person said:
 That the Atlantic waters were going be cold for the 'Dolphins,' ...
... you'd connect that to Miami deciding not to show up in their own stadium against the Buffalo Bills?

Or if I told you that suppose I was groping for some rationalization for having a terrible week picking...

Dang parity.  It makes Guru-ing pretty garsh-darn difficult.

On the eighth day of Ventriloquist Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Eight laughing fans
Seven hearty encores
Six classic shticks

Five Funny Jokes

Four face expressions
Three corny hats
Two moving eyebrows
And a brand new Ven-tril-o-quist Dummy

While you're still laughing, read this:

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