Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Hi, Atus

A meeting around the water cooler...

Chatty Cathy:  Hey, what's happened to the Bud-man?
Suave Steve:  I don't know.  He hasn't posted in days.
Chatty Cathy: You don't think he's ... done?
Suave Steve: Done? You mean, done as in ... done?

Cathy and Steve drink down their cups of water in cold silence. Then Steve crumples his cup and tosses it out.

Suave Steve:  You know, you read the guy's stuff, you cheer him on. You'd think he would have said something.  I just figured that he was taking a long Labor Day vacation.
Chatty Cathy:  He was pretty exhausted after Ventriloquists Down Under Week Month.  And the mystic moment thing wore me out just reading it.  If it turned out that he was... done, who'd blame him?
Suave Steve:  He's not ... done.  He just can't be ... done.

All Knowing Noel joins them at the cooler.

All Knowing Noel:  Why so glum, chums?
Chatty Cathy:  Budding Ventriloquist has gone dark. It's like a Monday on Broadway, except it's every day now.
Suave Steve:  We think he's ... done.
All Knowing Noel: Oh pish posh, people! He's not ... done. I got an email from him. Here, let me read it from you from my *high tech personal communications device.*

All Knowing Noel reads the email:
To my clowder* of regular readers:
Sorry I've been missing in action.  I'm planning something big. How big, you want to know?
After the Ventriloquist Down Under effort was such a success, I was befuddled. Not exactly a blue funk, but maybe kind of a turquoise funk, which is actually a wonderful funk if you can call it a funk. But I was lost in ponderous thought.
What next? How do I top that?
So I went and stood in the rain, hoping the drops running down my face would arouse my creative being. And it did! Just wait until you see it.
It's on the magnitude of the Winter Olympics.  Not the Budding Ventriloquist Winter Olympic Coverage (TM), mind you, but  the actual Winter Olympics.  Something that's going to change the way you think of a budding ventriloquist forever.
And you thought I was.... done, didn't you? 
Yours in ventriloquism,
Dan Bushman, Budding Ventriloquist
*A clowder is a group of cats.

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